


In This Thread

by lightningwaltz



Category: Fate/Zero
Genre: Gen, Yuletide Treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-23
Updated: 2012-12-23
Packaged: 2017-11-22 02:24:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/604775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lightningwaltz/pseuds/lightningwaltz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kariya and Aoi talk about the future.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In This Thread

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Erin_C](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Erin_C/gifts).



> Your prompt really jumped out at me. :) I'm very curious about this pair's shared past, and I find them both to be such tragic characters in their own ways. I was also inspired by how you wanted an exploration of Kariya's darker side. I just kind of hint at it here, but yes. It was also interesting to write a younger, less restrained Aoi. Thank you for such an intriguing prompt, and I hope you enjoy!

Early spring might be the most miserable of times. 

The jealous clouds steal sunlight away, and the roaring wind might peel someone’s face clean off. The earth below Kariya’s shoes is muddy, likely worm-filled, and he can’t forgive it for that. Everywhere he looks, the world is drawn in uninspiring hues of brown and gray, 

Aoi’s here though- drawing ever close as he walks towards her- and the razor-sharp breeze tugs at her perpetually unbound hair. Her hands are folded behind her back, and her smile reminds Kariya that someday this park will be verdant and alive. Not every month is like February, and not every place is like the Matou mansion. The cold is making her blush, and it’s the first vivid color he’s seen in hours. 

“Remember how so many of us used to come out here on weekends?” Aoi calls out to him, laughing a bit. “It looks like it’s just us nowadays. Not that I can blame them.” 

“The weather isn’t always so bad.” It’s true that he and Aoi had once belonged to a horde of students who had come here every weekend to hang out, goof off. They had been kids from mage families, mostly, in search of uncomplicated fun. One by one they had peeled away from the group. The reasons varied; duty, boredom, aging out, too much schoolwork. Either way, Kariya finds that he dislikes being reminded of them, and they now feel like interlopers on his memories. It always should have been just him and Aoi.

_She’s here now with you, isn’t she? She didn’t have to be._

Aoi nods at his small talk, but there’s a more pressing thought lurking in her mind. He can tell by the how her eyebrows knit together. 

“I heard my parents talking about my life after school.” She stops, as if even this is a betrayal to their discretion. “Last night.” 

“Really?” The muscles in Kariya’s abdomen clench tight. It was never good when the future came calling. Not in families like theirs. “What were they saying?”

She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. “They’re searching for a husband for me. Looks like I’ll be engaged within months. A year at most.” 

The news slams into Kariya like a bullet. 

It was bound to happen to Aoi, of course. The Zenjou family never produced heirs with magic circuits, but that was hardly their intention. Instead, they specialized in breeding daughters who amplify the skills of their offspring. Their sole purpose- in the grand scheme of things- is to be snatched up by mage houses. 

Yes, Kariya had known this day would come the first day he went to school. He’d known it from the instant he heard her last name during role call. At the time Kariya had thought _wow, I hope you don’t have to marry into my family._ He wouldn’t have wished _that_ on anyone.

Back then it had been a dispassionate notion borne of sympathy. Now he wonders if he inadvertently cursed himself.

Because he loves her. He knows this the instant he hears he can't have her, and he knows why it took so long for him to recognize it. He’s a Matou and sometimes only a violent shock can reveal what’s hidden. 

“Married?” That’s all he can say. He tries to picture it, and he can’t. Doesn't want to.

Aoi nods, and he thinks he can see… something in her gaze. Something that screams out _I’m too young for this._ That look, whatever it is, is gone in the blink of an eye. “So it would seem.” 

Kariya breathes out. His ears are already burning from the chilly air. “Have you tried telling your parents to take a hike?” It’s a joke disguising how the whole idea makes him frantic. Whoever this _husband_ turns out to be, he probably won’t love Aoi for her hidden quirks. They won’t care that she likes solving puzzle books in her free time. They won’t feel a rush of affection every time she reprimands anyone for their mistreatment of others.

_(“Do you not understand how they feel at all?” is her constant refrain when frustrated. There are angry fissures lurking just below Aoi’s graceful demeanor, and Kariya always watches in awe at every break in composure. How rare it is, in this world, to feel fury on behalf of someone else.)_

All of that will be washed away. She’ll be turned into the perfect docile mate, one of the obedient cogs of a magus house. And the sharp edges that Kariya loves will be washed away, like bright glass abandoned on a beach. 

He thinks Aoi can guess at some of his inner turmoil, because she buries her hands in her pockets and fixes him with a determined stare. 

“You don’t have to worry about me. I’ll be fine. I’ll probably end up loving him.”

“How can you know that?” He asks, even though he should be congratulating her and leaving well enough alone. “What if he’s cruel?”

“Well, to answer the first question, I’ve known this would happen for some time. I’ve always been resolved to feel affection for my husband because it’s my…” The wind swallows her words for a moment. “Because it would be easier.” She looks up at him as if to say _see? No big deal?_

“And the second question?” 

Aoi laughs as it were the most obvious thing in the world. “My parents know me pretty well! I don’t think they’d pick anyone who’d be cruel to me.” 

Kariya stares at Aoi, wanting her. 

Wanting to _be_ her. 

_(Because what must it be like to trust anyone like that?)_

His love and envy are all sewn up together, and probably always will be.

“I’m truly sorry,” Aoi says, and he recognizes that expression. She’s hiding behind propriety, and Aoi’s never done that to him before. But she already belongs to some other family, and it would seem she doesn’t want to disgrace them with excessive emotion. “I shouldn’t talk about myself so much.”

_But why shouldn’t you, though?_ Kariya thinks. _Why shouldn’t you?_


End file.
